First and Last Breaths

Joshua with Joseph's Lovey
Joshua with Joseph’s Lovey

I would like to introduce to you, Joshua Asher Scott!

Joshua was born on April 10, 2013; a robust 8 lb 6 oz with a striking head full of hair.

As I walked myself down the stoic hallway of the hospital into the frigid operating room for my scheduled cesarean section, I was experiencing a surreal moment.  I chanted in my mind, “Am I really about to have another baby?”  The pregnancy flew by (believe it or not) and I was about to do this newborn thing all over again.  As I cautiously entered the operating room for my third c-section, I was more frightful because I knew exactly what was about to happen.  You see, my motto now with giving birth is, “NO PAIN, NO PAIN”!  I wanted to clearly direct the anesthesiologist about how to do his job to make sure that my spinal had no flaws.

There we went.  Spinal inserted…legs hot and tingly…wide awake…within minutes surgery had begun and merely minutes afterwards, my Joshua Asher took his first breath.  The nurses snugged the curtain down so that I could look at him.  My first thought was, “He is smaller than my other boys.”  He was so tight, compact, and strong.  Then I heard his sweet cry; the moment that he communicated with me for the first time verbally.  Forever connected with a bond that only a mother and a child can have.

Joshua was born in the same hospital that my first-born son, Joseph was born in and also died in at 4 years, 4 months of age.  Joseph took his FIRST breath in that hospital and also his LAST breath there.  I facilitated him coming into this world and also him leaving this world to enter his eternal heavenly home.

I have been thinking about first and last breaths.  First breaths only happen once.  Last breaths also only happen once.  It is all of the breaths in between that compile our life.  As I sit here right now and listen to Joshua’s non-rhythmic breaths, I am intrigued to know how many actual breaths a person breaths in his or her lifetime.  Millions…Billions…Trillions?

I can’t control the first breath nor can I can control the last breath that I breath, but I can choose to FULLY LIVE with the breaths in between.  I can embrace the future and the unknown with grace, hope, and love knowing that life truly is a GIFT!  It is our moment in time to impact the world; to impact others eternally.

I love the picture of Joshua with Joseph’s lovey because it is a symbol of new life and life no longer on this earth.  It reminds me that life is fleeting and is a vapor. It reminds me to ENJOY the life that I have TODAY.

Life does move on and we DO keep breathing breaths.  It is our choice as to how we want to spend those breaths.

A Forever Family of 5
A Forever Family of 5

I would like to encourage you today to breathe your breaths with hope and purpose!  You are loved and are here with a role that only you can fulfill.  Choose to LIVE your LIFE FULLY and EMBRACE your God-given PURPOSE!

22 thoughts on “First and Last Breaths

  1. Oh Joy, I have tears in my eyes reading this! How so very sweet that Joshua is holding onto Joseph’s lovey! Love what you wrote too! How true it is to fully live between your breaths. Don’t take a day for granted and truly live for the Lord!! I try to remind myself and others who want to look at someone else and see their faults–“We are here to serve the Lord and we have to answer for what we did.”

    Thank you for posting this. Much love to you!

  2. Joy so beautiful and remarkably written. Thank you for sharing your heart and encouraging us all!

  3. MY PRECIOUS JOY : YOUR WRITING IS REMARKABLE. I LOVE TO READ AND LEARN FROM YOUR LIFE AND DEATH EXPERIENCE . IT IS TRUE THAT WE ALL EXPERIENCE FIRST BREATH AND LAST BREATH. I STRIVE TO LIVE MY LIFE HERE ON EARTH PLEASING TO GOD; SO WHEN I TAKE MY LAST BREATH I WILL ENTER MY ETERNAL HEAVENLY HOME!

  4. Joy, this is beautiful! Thank you for sharing this incredible insight. I love seeing God’s grace in your family!

  5. Thank you, Joy! Your transparency and vulnerability through your writing continually challenge me. You are amazing and our God is glorified through you. Love you! Living and Breathing!

  6. So beautiful Joy. Thanks for sharing your journey of hope with us. Congrats on that beautiful new addition. And for teaching us all how to really breathe and experience a life of true joy and no regrets.

  7. Thank you so much for sharing this story! It’s beautiful and wonderfully written. I really learned a lot from this post and I enjoyed it so much. Your article kept me encouraged and inspired. Again, thank you so much. 🙂

  8. Thank you Joy for a beautiful reminder to live life FULLY in the present, to keep breathing despite the pain, to breathe despite loss and sorrow and to breathe in the sweet surprises and gifts that this short life on earth brings! It is with this breath that I am grateful for Our Heavenly Father’s unending grace and love!

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