I’ve been thinking lately about all of the different interests and passions that people have, particularly amongst moms. Whether your a homeschool mom, working mom, or soccer mom we all find ourselves drawn towards a particular niche of “mommyhood.” We all have different personalities, passions, and lures that make us tick.
How many pinterest moms do we have reading? (Confession: I am not a pinterest mom, nor am I cutesy or crafty, but that’s OK!)
What I have observed via conversations, facebook, etc. is that most mom’s have an opinion or preference about how they are living their life. Some moms have more of an opinion or preference. To take it even further, some mom’s share their opinion or preference as absolute truth and everyone should conform to their opinion, preference, or absolute truth (whether it be or not). As a result of this strong view women start cat-fighting to defend themselves or their children. (Because you know, nobody better mess with a mama’s child.)
Insecurity, pride, and hurt rise to the surface because a mom can just feel judged. The sad truth is that sometimes there is judgement towards others because we are passionate, strong, and naturally good in some areas.
What I have observed is that we tend to judge others who are weak in an area because we are strong.
For example, the mom who is naturally highly self-motivated operates in a discipline that is intimidating to others. She gets up at 5:00 am, has prayer time, exercises, does three loads of laundry and makes breakfast before the kids awake. She has a routine and sticks to it no matter what. Her energy is boundless. This type-A person is vulnerable to judging others who do not live their lives the way that she does. Actually, pride could be attached to it. She thinks that she is somehow better than her “lazy” girlfriend who rolls out of bed and flies into the carpool line. Discipline is good and we all need it, but can this person fall prey to pridefully judging others who are weak in this area because they are strong ? Yes! This woman may be strong in this area due to personality or a natural inclination that comes easier to her.
Another example could be a mom who is struggling with her weight. She tries and tries to lose weight with little avail. While another ectomorph-born mom who has never had a weight issue eats almost whatever she wants criticizes her. She says, “well, if she would just eat salad and run, she would drop some pounds. The mom struggling with her weight may have some hormonal issues and dropping weight is far beyond easy.
A homeschool mom could judge (or secretly thinks she is doing a better job) with her kids because she is in her element at home. She judges because she is afforded the opportunity to have an option that other moms may not have.
The list goes on and on…
I confess that I have secretly judged others out of my strengths. I have judged from my own insecurity and/or pride. When we judge others, it many times can be traced back to these two sinful downfalls.
My appeal to all of the moms, women, and sisters out there is to read the scriptures on grace and love towards others.
What would it look like if we didn’t get insecure when “all natural” mom shares her organic recipes that she made last week? What if we said, “Good for her!” What if the “all natural” mom just lived her “all natural” life and didn’t judge people who can’t afford to eat this way. Maybe the family is just trying to keep the lights on and go to work. There is little time for recipe prowling and execution of healthy meals.
What if we did what Philippians 2:3 says to do?
“Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem the other better than himself.”
WARNING: The following scriptures will hurt, but we all need to hear it. Matthew 7
“Do not judge, or you too will be judged. 2 For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.3 “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? 4 How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? 5 You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.
Lets all focus on the plank in our own eye. None of us are perfect and we all have weaknesses. Let’s work on ourselves instead of criticizing each other.
Sisters, we need each other! Let’s build one another up and be secure enough to let other women “do their thing!”
Sisters, “do your thing” without judging others!
I would love to hear your comments on this topic!
Love ya Sis,