Category: Knowing God

“Don’t let anyone see me cry.  Just act like everything is ok, even though the pit in the core of my stomach tells me something differently.  Just keep, ‘the everything is wonderful face’ topped off with a smile and keep going.” These are just a few mantras that I have chanted over and over in my mind to keep myself together when my emotional radar was sirening that something was wrong.  I’ve learned from Lysa Terkeurst that emotions are INDICATORS, not DICTATORS.

 As women, God gave us the gift of being more emotional.  We feel things emotionally and unfortunately, even amongst other believers, sometimes it just isn’t accepted.  So do you know what we all do?  We stuff and act like nothing is wrong instead of being honest about where we really are.  What if we, as Godly women, can be truly honest about where we are and express and release our emotions in a safe place, without fear?  BEING LESS EMOTIONAL DOESN’T MAKE YOU MORE GODLY!  Did that just help someone?  Sometimes, being honest about your emotions and venting them out to Him makes you MORE Godly!  Just look at David in the Bible.  He was considered a man after God’s own heart and look at all of the whining and crazy things that he said while processing his emotions to God.  This is it though; we can’t sin in our emotional state!  That is not ok!  It’s ok to be emotional and be honest about it.  It’s ok to cry!  It’s ok to get it out, but it’s not ok to sin or hurt others via gossip, losing control, cursing others, or turning to substances, shopping, etc. to cope.  

 What if we could truly be honest?  It seems as though women, overall, have a hard time doing that for many reasons:

 1. Pride. We don’t want to appear weak or unspiritual. Let’s face it! We do not always have it together!  Sometimes we are weak.  It’s ok to be weak.  My Bible says that when I am weak, then HE can be strong in me. 

 2. Fear of being misunderstood.  I have been misunderstood many times.  It’s ok too!  God intimately understands me and I am living to please Him and I have his approval…and so do you!

 3. There is no one available to talk to.  There is a BIG benefit of being in a small group.  You can always call anyone in the group to talk to.  These are people who know you and are sharing their lives with you. Many women don’t want to impose on anyone else.  Get over it please!  Your vulnerability may actually help them.

 4. Getting Hurt. Yes, I promise you will get hurt at some point in your life when you open up your heart to others, but by never opening up your heart is a trillion times worse. When someone hurts you, just forgive that person, let it go, and move on.  Find others who are not going to hurt you!  Be proactive.  Don’t stuff. 

 GIRLFRIENDS!  You don’t have to carry everything yourself!

 DISCLAIMER: This article is not an encouragement to let your emotions run wild and and free to whomever and by saying whatever.  It is an encouragement to pay attention to those tears that are welling up in your eyes and that knot in your stomach because you are valuable and important.  Trust me.  Stuffing emotions is going to hurt you and your most valuable relationships in the long run.  I learned that holding it all together may seem like I am doing everyone a favor, but in the long run, I am not.  It’s not going to be fruitful if you don’t acknowledge, process, and release the emotions.

 God gave us each other.  We were never meant to walk alone.  When I am weak, I run and hide behind my heavenly Father.  I turn off my brain and let him protect me.  I can’t figure everything out.  I also transparently share my tears, fears, and weakness with others.  I am not trying to be a Christian rock star.  I am a fragile, human being with real, raw, emotions who needs others in this harsh world until I get to heaven. 

“If I must boast, I would rather boast about the things that show how weak I am.” 2 Corinthians 11:30

 Do you stuff your true emotions? Who can you share your true emotions with?

 Keeping it real,

Joy

When walking through a valley in your life there are many things that are important to overcoming and not getting stuck in the pain.

One vital key to overcoming is to have a core of people around you that love you…just because.  You can face anything with encouraging truth, support, and love.

When you don’t have the strength to believe or see the future, it is others that are committed to you that carry you during these times.

In my own life, just knowing that Jon is committed to me and that Josiah adores me is anchoring for my soul.  But on another level, I have an extended spiritual family that fills in the gaps that my family alone can not fill.  We were created for relationships. When the web of spiritual family comes together to carry you during a dark time, you can overcome anything!  The strength and power that this brings to your life during weak times is not comparable to anything else in the world.

Relationships are what life is all about.  We need a core of people who will be there when times are good and when times are tough.  It is spiritual family that remains constant, even through all of their imperfections and mistakes.  No one is perfect.  You may not even talk to some people that much, but you know that they are around and love you without expectation.

In Ecclesiastes 4:10  it says, “For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up!”

You never know when a hard time will strike your life.  If you are not rooted and grounded in the house of the Lord and committed to others, then it is more difficult to carry the load alone.  Our hearts get faint sometimes and that can set us up to be deceived if we don’t have others reminding us of the truth and encouraging us in who we really are.

“Those who are firmly planted in the house of the Lord will flourish.”

So today, are you connected to others?  Maybe it’s a small group at church or a group of people that you serve with.  Who are those that you are committed to walking with even when you don’t feel like it?  Life gets busy and it’s easy to say, “Us four, no more.”  Sometimes, it’s inconvenient to be committed to going to your small group or showing up for that outreach.  When a trying time comes, those people will be already established in your life to be able to love and support you.

“May the Lord make your love increase and overflow for each other and for everyone else, just as ours does for you.” I Thessalonians 3:12

I thank God that we were committed to others when Joseph passed away.  It truly was spiritual family that carried us through the darkest days of our lives.  I don’t know where we would be without them.  We definitely wouldn’t be where we are now!